I meant to write this as it unfolded, but I was stuck and indecisive. I wanted to write write it. By hand. I'm also lazy, so as I arrived at each future point that became the present, where I'd planned to start writing it all down I would find something better to do. Now, even though only a couple of weeks have passed, I fear I will start forgetting the details and this will defeat the purpose of recording things in the first place!

However, now I realize that it may have been for the best because my feelings about the whole affair have changed and I'm able to record them with some perspective. I started very confused and angry. I'm now in a more mellow frame of mind. More empathetic to all involved. More trusting of God and how He has woven my life together. I am learning to give up my need for control and to trust His timing. 

So, let me tell you about the time I found out the dad I never knew was dead and met my two little brothers. This is a story of unspoken hopes dashed and then redeemed. A story of the pain of deep grief, and surprising immediate connection. It is overwhelming and leaves me full of wonder. At a time in my life when I thought I would never understand the nature of God as my loving heavenly Father, He planned a circumstance that would perfectly illustrate how easy it can be for me to trust Him and feel like a precious daughter.